Boyfriend in Japan? Possibly, but there are too many coincidences going on here.
Though I'm trying to focus on the bf back home part - makes it easier to handle - there's this nagging gut feeling that it's not true.
They both went to shabu-shabu (apparently independently because neither mentioned the other), she couldn't talk on the phone then and I thought I heard his voice in the background, she knew about the last-minute dumpling party while he was out at dinner (supposedly not with her, and why would he call her and only her?), she's moving to his dorm next host transition apparently because someone else has back problems (though recently she says her back has been great)...
Too many coincidences... but for once I'm trying really hard not to think about it (not working too well).
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Sunday, February 21, 2010
E vs HB
One for the first.
One for the unexpected.
One for the learning.
One for the second chance.
One for the ostracization.
One for the one that got away.
One for the dashed hope.
One for the thread being cut. (thankfully from not so high of a place)
One for the bad timing.
One for the betrayal.
One for the abuse.
One for the unknown.
People say I am a good looking person. People say that I am kind. People say that I am nice (some people say I am too nice... which is bad?). People assume I'm popular.
So why is it that I'm always alone? Although I feel like the feeling was just budding, walking home today in the chillier-than-recently damp air my subconscious seemed to find the perfect song (that I hadn't heard for years) and played it in my inner stereo - Backstreet Boys' "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely".
Though in my head, the chorus was, "Is this the feeling of being lonely."
I feel like I want to talk about it... but I can't seem to make myself bring it up with anyone. The feeling, like I said, was just budding. But I'm pretty sure it was growing (slowly). But the timing is (really) bad... and well, I'm not 100% sure, but it certainly seems like I'm not even a consideration. It's something that I should be able to walk away from with minimal (no) impact, yet here I am, typing away.
One for the unexpected.
One for the learning.
One for the second chance.
One for the ostracization.
One for the one that got away.
One for the dashed hope.
One for the thread being cut. (thankfully from not so high of a place)
One for the bad timing.
One for the betrayal.
One for the abuse.
One for the unknown.
People say I am a good looking person. People say that I am kind. People say that I am nice (some people say I am too nice... which is bad?). People assume I'm popular.
So why is it that I'm always alone? Although I feel like the feeling was just budding, walking home today in the chillier-than-recently damp air my subconscious seemed to find the perfect song (that I hadn't heard for years) and played it in my inner stereo - Backstreet Boys' "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely".
Though in my head, the chorus was, "Is this the feeling of being lonely."
I feel like I want to talk about it... but I can't seem to make myself bring it up with anyone. The feeling, like I said, was just budding. But I'm pretty sure it was growing (slowly). But the timing is (really) bad... and well, I'm not 100% sure, but it certainly seems like I'm not even a consideration. It's something that I should be able to walk away from with minimal (no) impact, yet here I am, typing away.
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